I want to pray but I feel I can’t
So much blocking those channels
No peace of mind
Forget about headspace
But who says that is necessary for me
To say what I want to say
Do I really need my environment to be quiet
In order to express those thoughts?

So what I end up doing is pouring a bottle of milk for the baby
While praying for the mothers who can’t
Thinking yet not thinking of the babies who will no longer be drinking milk
Cleaning up messes while thanking Hashem for them
And asking him to bring the children home
So that they can make messes in their homes
As children tend to do
And while I cook dinner I ask that wives and mothers out there
Will soon be able to have their loved ones home
Eating at the table again

And to please help those in pain to heal
The gaping wounds to close
And this is where I get stuck in my prayers
Because I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like
Going through what people are going through
Don’t want to think too much about it
Would rather pray about it
Ask Hashem to heal those wounded hearts
Those numb feelings

Please bring us all home to you
Connect with us once again
Make us be the children you want us to be
Without having to have us endure all this pain
Making yourself cry along with us

Please listen to what I can’t say
Am not ready to express
Don’t have time to articulate
And help me say what I need to say
And know that it doesn’t need to be quiet in order for me to pray
And cry